About two weeks ago, I worried myself by thinking that what remained of my breast cancer scar was "different." Recurrence IS possible at any time, and at some times it is hard to ignore and set aside. In spite of assuaging my anxiety with too many cookies, I took action and called in the troops.
Finally, today I got into see a BC surgeon (my original one moved to another state). Aside from waiting in his waiting room for an hour (with my fidgety DH), the visit was a huge relief. We looked at my last mammogram film and he showed me where the tumor used to be, and the markers around it. And I got new information. The larger the breast, the longer the post-surgery changes are likely to take, the longer the radiation swelling last. If the circulation near the surgery is sufficiently interrupted, the tissues die, and may or may not make a lump, and may or may not make a cyst (if the lump dissolves.)
I'm not sure I like knowing there is all of this cellular activity going on within me without my knowledge. I do like knowing that none of THESE activities point to a greater liklihood of a new tumor.
The MD and DH and I agreed to accelerate the timing of my next mammogram and he helped me "butt in line" so that I have an appointment for a big squish AND a sonogram tomorrow. I'm glad he was sympathetic about my fear, and encouraging about the prognosis.
Mine had to have been better than the woman who took up an "extra" hour of the MD's time, and who emerged from the examination area red-eyed and leaning on her husband.
I felt so good, I had a glass of wine with dinner.
And then, so relieved I had a long nap!
And then, so energized, I did some sketches.
" Life is MORE than just a bowl of cherries."
There are more at flickr if you click on it.