Thursday, March 02, 2006

Abandonment Depression

Can you imagine what it would be like to be intermittently and repeatedly ignored (or abandoned) as an infant? Life threatening. Terrifying. Talk about PTSD.

It wouldn't even have to be the sort of horrifying abandonment that makes the news when somebody leaves a baby in a blanket on the firehouse steps... or even in a dumpster. My hopeful belief is that those babies get fussed over and appreciated. No, I'm talking about children who just don't have caregivers who "get" them. . Children whose needs are constantly being under-met and under-noticed, but who out of self-preservation pretend that they're fine.

Some of them even grow up and look like they're doing fine.

I was reminded of this phrase when doing my homework about business development.
And odd combination, probably... but the point was that when sole proprietors and/or entrepreneurs get overwhelmed, if they were "abandoned" as children, they abandon themselves as adults.

They don't feed themselves well.
They don't see that they get enough sleep. (It's 3 am, do you know where you should be?)
They don't get praised for their accomplishments.
They don't get encouraged to do things that matter to them.
They don't get appropriate medical/dental/health care.

If you found somebody who was abandoned, what would you KNOW to do for them?
I seem to have forgotten.
I believe there's still time for me to get over it.

Suggestions welcome.
Do you think dancing would help?

8 comments:

Ninotchka said...

Take care of yourself, woman! And yes, dancing helps. :)

SB said...

Oh, dear.

This is really painful.

Knitting Painter Woman said...

Hey, y'all... the mulligrubs have pretty much gone for now. I cried with a friend. Went to bed slightly earlier than sometimes. Did NOT overeat. Imagined myself being held in the arms of a fairy godmother. Paid bills. Made some plans.

Anonymous said...

Hi PW,
Of course dancing helps, moving, listening to music, singing along, all good stuff. I have almost finished my painting of the Spanish dancer of substance, I'll try and take a picture and show you if you like. Maybe you need to get back to the colours and do some art therapy, perhaps blending, smoothing with the brushes and your fingers will lift your spirits. Perspectives change as you lift your eyes and see the prism of colours that are in and around you.
Catch today and be happy,
Meadow

AscenderRisesAbove said...

I havent finished this book completely but I wonder if "Riding the Dragon; The Artist Way at Work" would help?

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0688166350/002-8778085-0396039?v=glance&n=283155

Adapting their techniques for fostering creativity as a means to spiritual fulfillment for the workplace, the authors of The Artist's Way at Work have shown that people can thrive at their jobs when they take time to nurture their spirit and listen to their thoughts. The book features psychological guidance, anecdotes, and exercises to assist the reader in sorting out the multitude of happenings, commitments, and choices in one's life.

AscenderRisesAbove said...

Also there is this one that might be of interest?

The Highly Sensitive Person Workbook; Thrive When the World Overwhelms You

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0767903374/104-8000171-5567952?v=glance&n=283155

scribblesk said...

I really draw strength from the presence of God in Jesus' words when He says I will never leave you or forsake you even if I don't always feel it I know somewhere beyond feeling that I am deeply loved and will not be forsaken.

Anonymous said...

Read Alice Miller. The Truth Will Set You Free and The Drama of the Gifted Child